Tuesday, August 26, 2008
"It doesn’t mean much to be a man of importance. The most important person at a funeral is the dead man." - CJ Langenhoven
A person I knew briefly, died a few days ago. Until recently I never understood death and how it fits into our cycle of interaction on this planet. I had no real way of reacting naturally to death and the way I did end up reacting was - I am ashamed to say - contrived. I knew I was supposed to feel things in a certain way and even coaxed the odd tear or two. Not to fake it just convincing myself this is how I should be at the time to fit into reacting to death. It never felt right though.
I have been very fortunate now to understand the meaning behind death with a lot more clarity. The perpetuated sadness is not ideal. I am not advocating massive changes to dealing with losing a child, husband or friend. Understanding what occurs though is well advised as it is far removed from the lazy, yet bizarre notions most of the people I know have on the subject. In fact the effects of how we deal with death are not lost, but have impact on the being departed from the physical world, so it is not only worthwhile working out what the vibe is with death, but in fact beneficial to the person you love.
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2 comments:
Interested in your ideas of the impact one's grieving process would have on the person departed - from your last sentence I gather you feel that those left behind still have an influence on those who have moved on? Mind to explain please?
They certainly do. The departed has left only the physical world. They continue to exist in the spirit world. This is not a separate 'place', in fact it is a world we all live in along with the physical world, but have forgotten how recognise this. The departed has now to deal with the fact that they have no physical aspect to themselves and if they are like most humans this is not something they are familiar with and will sometimes try and hang onto the physical. Those left behind are still observed by the departed and the manner of the reaction to their physical death can cause problems. This is my loose interpretation in words of the death of the physical body in the 'process' of life - of a human being.
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